The Second International Art Fair by Bruce McClean (b.1944)
(currently one of the only art works on the nursery wall....)
Are you sitting down? It is a query I have made more times than I can remember over the last few months. I was about to deliver some rather surprising news and I didn’t want anyone to fall over? Touch wood, no serious accidents to date, although I have witnessed several jaws drop and have seen more than a few usually eloquent friends reduced to jabbering, gibberish and even stunned silence.
The news in question was that, after many, many years of fruitless efforts and despite my extraordinarily advanced years, I was finally pregnant with a little girl, who is due on 15th February, which some of you may remember is actually Tim’s birthday.
Do hope you will forgive us for being what must seem rather secretive about this momentous news? We made a conscious decision years ago not to bore our friends with the details of this particularly protracted and often emotionally and physically gruelling “journey”.
We just felt that it was essentially of little interest to anyone who does not have a stake in the child in question? Many of you will also be aware of my own history of loss and bereavement and, believe me, having such a sorry tale of personal woe tends to give you a low threshold for sympathy and concern, no matter how very well meant?
As you might imagine, we have also had to be tested for everything under the sun but the good news is that, as far as they can tell, she is pretty well perfect and I, too, have been absurdly well? The words “textbook pregnancy” have been bandied about, much, I suspect, to the disappointment of the consultant, who was rather hoping for an ideal guinea pig for her “very very elderly prima gravida” research!
In fact, the biggest surprise was that she was a girl: the first Kirkman princess for something like six generations? We just presumed she was a boy but established a few months ago that there was a distinct lack of dangly bits on the sonographer’s screen and although we were only interested in ten fingers and ten toes, we did have to do something of a mental adjustment. Tim, for example, is no longer sure that he wants her to play rugby for England but I am rather more: well, if she wants to, then why not?
Sadly, we also encountered quite a few negative reactions to the fact that a couple our age were attempting to become parents? Some people simply don’t approve of assisted conception, which I do understand, and there were also quite a few people who suggested it would have been more public-spirited of us to adopt a child who needed a future? FWIW, we did explore adoption and I have actually written quite extensively about how the process in this country needs to be simplified. In the end, it was just not for us?
So I do hope you will understand why we have been so circumspect about broadcasting this news? It is hardly the kind of thing you can drop into a casual conversation and the fact that I just looked slightly plump for the first seven months meant that nobody remarked upon the fact that I was expanding! I am now however waddling around like a goose and am finally being offered a seat on the bus…
Obviously, everyone is entitled to their opinions but honestly, this child is already so anticipated, cherished and loved, we feel absolutely blessed, if utterly terrified at the same time!
So there it is. I do hope you will be happy for us and wish us well as we undertake this slightly scary journey! For those of you who have kept "mum" so to speak for the last weeks, thank you so much! Your discretion was appreciated. For anyone feeling a bit miffed you weren't in on the secret, we hope you can understand why, after suffering so many heartbreaking disappointments, we were not happy to go public until we knew she was well and safely on her way?
We would really love to hear all your suggestions and memories of your own favourite childhood books as we are hoping that "Princess Squidley" (don't ask but do cross your fingers the name doesn't stick until she is in her teens....) accumulates a wonderful library of literature to open her mind and excite her curiosity?
Please don't feel you have to knit anything at all or seek out anything too terrifyingly pink? Don't you think this poor child has enough to contend with already! On which point, we have ruled out Aurora (Rory) as a potential name too? Enough people will be reminding her of her notorious uncle without drawing attention to the connection!
If you would like to hear more gory details, do send me a PM on Facebook or email at the usual atlas.co.uk address which I think is lurking somewhere on my own FB info page? Please bear with me if I don't respond straight away?
We will, of course, post some pics, once she gets here but I don't expect to be on-line that much over the next couple of months? I am also taking a rather well-timed break from the Daily Mail, where recent changes have made me even more reluctant than I was about my association? I am hoping to find a more appropriate forum for my work when I return full time - hopefully in the not too distant future!
